Was Your Father a Thief?
by Duskiscoming
Summary: In their quest to recruit more female members the male Death Eater's turn towards a Muggle-Studies textbook for help. But will these mysterious "Pick-Up lines" do more help then harm? Will Tom Riddle sway Minerva Mcgonagall to the other side? :oneshot:


**Disclaimer**_: I do not own Harry Potter_

_**+Special thanks to my amazing beta nana banana xx3 for putting in the time and effort to make this piece the best it can be+ **_

_**Was Your Father A Thief?**_

_" Well_?" The dark haired young man gripped thee sides of his chair in agitation.

" Has no one fulfilled the tasks I set forth?"

The other young man scattered at his feet refused to meet his gaze, which burned as brightly as the fire that was dying in the common room grate. Finally a loutish grey-eyed boy spoke:

" M-my Lord, w-we have attempted to recruit others…but most have been less then cooperative…"

His whining was cut short by a withering look thrown from the high-back chair. " Then that is why you are not trying hard enough," came the cold reply.

" Honestly can no one-"

" Girls."

" What?"

" I said Girls m' lord," the voice came from a curly brown haired boy in the corner.

" And what of them Avery?"

" Well um, m' lord you see…we don't really have any at the present moment so maybe…" The boy searched the stone floor as if it contained the ending of his sentence.

" Ballocks, girls are weak!" A narrowed face second year interjected, but was silenced with the simple wave of one long fingered hand.

" As I was saying m' Lord," Avery continued as he dug through his knapsack, " Girls talk you see in the library in the hallways…"

" In the bathroom," another added, " they never shut-up!"

" Enough!" The sparks flew from the tip of the ring-leader's wand and the others fell silent.

" Now if you could please-get to the point." A large leather-bound book soon landed in his outstretched hand, his expression turning to disgust as he read the title in large gold letters: " Muggle Studies?" he asked incredulously, reading the title aloud."

I assure you m' Lord, I was placed in that class due to my lack of credits I-"

His assurances of his innocence concerning the manner fell on deaf ears as the spider-like fingers opened up to a marked page:

**The Pick- Up Line**_**In the absence of any magical means, male muggles often resort to various, and overall creative means to arouse feelings of devotion and or romantic feelings in the female counterpart. One of the tactics includes the " pick-up", line. That is a phrase or statement used to attain the interest of another the most popular among them including…**_

He stopped reading and looked into the faces of each of his awaiting servants. As much as he hated to admit it, they had a point. Not a feminine feature was to be found among the testosterone driven group, and though it might not affected them so much at the present moment, in order to fully complete his grand plans for the future they needed to expand their horizons.

So it is was this in mind that he began to put a plan into motion.

First, a list was drawn of prospective candidates that they determined to be most susceptible to these lines, thus more likely to join their cause. The majority coming from Slytherin, closely followed by Hufflepuff:

" They're the most dim-witted," Knott explained while adding two more names to the list " they won't be able to resist us."

Smatterings of Ravenclaw were added to the list before the boys tackled the last and (subsequently) most complicated portion of the Hogwarts' population: Gryffindor girls.

" I don't want to pick up any of them," a fourth year known as Solomon laminated in disgust, " their pompous and pig-headed and… altogether too large to pick up." Snorts of laughter shot forth from the rest of the group, but their moments of mirth were cut short as the raven-haired boy returned from his Prefect duties.

Gulping nervously the group handed over the findings. He glanced over them quickly, before taking the quill from Knott's hand and adding a mark of his own before leaving. They waited until they heard his retreating footsteps to lean over the bits of parchment to see what he had written. A small ripple of surprise emanated from them all as they read the name printed clear as day, and as bold as brass underneath the previous blank column:

_Minerva Mcgonagall_

Though this particular conquest was seemingly hopeless, there was a hushed consensus among them that if anyone could complete the impossible, Tom Riddle could.

" Hey! Wait, Francie!" The red-headed Ravenclaw turned around quickly, her eyes narrowed at the approaching Slytherin.

" What do you want Bulls?" she demanded, eyeing him with suspicion. A moment of silence followed as he caught his breath and adjusted his green and silver tie.

" I-I just needed to ask you are you from…" he tried to discreetly tried to consult a note from his pocket but failed miserably "…are you from Tennessee?"

The girl's brow furrowed as she replied: " What are you playing at? You know very well that my family's from London."

" Yeah but, you're the only ten I see."

" Have you been sniffing the cauldron fumes again?" she demanded.

" Well, you see, um…"

" Just leave me alone alright?" with that she stomped off in the other direction.

Bulls' housemates had similar stories, each with varying degrees of failure. Avery barely escaped with his limbs intact as he questioned a shy Hufflepuff whether:

"…Her feet hurt…because you've been running through my dreams all night."

Failing to take into account her less then meek boyfriend being within earshot of the proclamation.

With this overall track record no one dared ask how their leader was fairing out in this mad Muggle game they had all decided to throw themselves into. Besides, he would tell them when it was time.

Bright sunlight poured through the window as two Gryffindor's hovered over their open textbooks.

" Minerva, how did you answer number five?" " Herb Wycliffe," she replied without looking up. "

Wasn't he the one who tamed the Giant Squid?"

" No, he was the co-founder of the Department for the Regulation and Care of Magical Creatures."

" Close enough," her friend scribbled down the note into her notebook, before trailing off into more interesting waters.

" So do you know what that boy Knott asked me yesterday in Charms?" He had the _gull_ to ask if it hurt when I fell from heaven! Now how inane is that?"

" Slytherin's aren't known for being the brightest pixies in the bush Gwendolyn." Minvera said smiling slightly.

" No I guess not," her friend replied laughing, " they haven't tried anything with you have they?"

" Not to my knowledge, no." Her hands became busy with arranging the remainder of her school books as her friend rose,

" I have to go see Slughorn for a make-up on last weeks drill. I guess I'll see you back at the common room?"

" Yeah sure." A cloud passed across the sun as her workspace was soon engulfed in shadow.

Not long after this, Minerva found herself wandering through the corridors, reluctant to go back to the dormitory. She knew the feeling of uneasiness settling in her stomach was irrational. _Those little snakes are being stupid that's all! _Her mind tried _to _reason_, it comes with the territory of being in that house, stupid, irrational,_ _selfish...crafty..._

Then why did she feel like she was missing something?

" Hail fair lass!" A robust voice echoed off the stone walls of the corridor, making Minerva jump hastily to the side.

" Sir Cadagan , h-how are you?"

She watched as the knight bowed gallantly in a field of daises, his armor clanked dutifully at the bend of his waist. His fat grey pony munched lazily off to the side.

" Um, didn't the headmaster assign you to patrol the seventh floor?" _And to leave the students and faculty alone_? she thought privately.He was practically giddy with excitement in his reply:

" Yes m' lady I have been given such a quest! And rightfully so! For it has been my displeasure to come upon a group of vile scallywags from the house of Slytherin!" Minerva's stomach jumped somewhere within her throat.

" And did they see you?" she asked the knight.

" No miss! Of course not!" he seemed offended that she would even consider this, " My valiant stead Meriwether," with this he slapped the pony on the rump, " and I avoided detection from all four rouges present."

" Did you see any of their faces by chance?"

" Alas I did not," he replied " but all those present from the tenor of their voices and height did not seem to rise above the fifth year-sixth at the very most."

At this report Minerva bit her lip and twirled her wand awkwardly between her fingers. One half, the sensible, well-meaning half, knew that as Head Girl it was her duty to alert a teacher or the Headmaster about these illicit activities. But the other, more Gryffindor prone side, reasoned that by then they may be gone.

" Should I alert the proper authorities?" the boisterous knight volunteered after a moments silence.

" No," McGonagall said hastily, " no…just keep watch if I do not come back in thirty-minutes time please inform Professor Dumbledore."

The knight bowed again, this time with a look of utmost gravity on his features. " I shall watch the clock as if I was counting down my last hours."

Minerva nodded and turned around sharply, making her way quickly to the opposite end of the corridor.

Avery kicked the wall in his sulk, making a torch rattle slightly in its holder.

"Your face is priceless," Knott laughed.

" Shut up." he replied touching the rim of a sizeable bruise around his left eye, the handiwork of one irritated Ravenclaw boyfriend. " Besides I don't see you bringing any new additions."

" Well I was closer then you at least!"

" Oh right, I suppose when you asked Kendra if she could be your new teddy bear, that she was supposed to melt!"

" Well I'm sorry if my lines are beyond _your _comprehension!"

" Gobbledygook is beyond _your _comprehension!" They stood glaring at each other until Tom and Solomon broke into the conversation and the former of the two addressed them.

He was less then pleased. " It has come to my attention," he said smoothly " that all of you have failed miserably." His tone did not warrant a discussion, " and those not among us are in the process of failing miserably." Still no reaction from the others.

" So before we draw anymore attention towards ourselves please put a halt to this incredibly childish production. That is all."

The three boys bowed and hastily made their way down the winding staircase leaving one alone in the darkness.

The dim echo was heard from the bottom of the stairwell, giving Minerva just enough time to doge behind a statue of a irritable looking panda. Stealthy as a cat, she peered behind two outstretched claws to absorb three boys in deep conversation. Three is not four. She still had time before Sir talks-a -lot was ordered to raise the alarm so she waited until their footsteps had died away before starting her ascent.

" Lumos," Keeping her hand on the wall for balance, Minerva braced herself against the steadily chilling air as she continued to climb. "This better be worth it," she muttered irritably, snagging her sleeve on a bare hook, ripping it audibility.

Reading the last few lines of the passage by wand light Tom felt the anger swell within him again. His eyes scanning down to the last line that he had missed in his haste:

_**" …while commonly used, these lines are only 5 affective, varying in degrees depending upon the intelligence and sobriety level of the receiving party…"**_

In other words, the lines were totally useless. _Just like thier creators_, Tom thought hotly. Not only has this plan wasted valuable time, drawn unneeded attention to them from the rest of the student body, it also made him feel dirty, corrupted, like his father.

Tom had not been able to test his line on the person he had intended, and mulled over the fact with some regret. A year older then he, Minerva McGonagall would have done well as a spy for both his rival house and that meddlesome Professor Dumbledore. Yes, it could have been quite convenient having her as a agent, he slammed the book shut. But of course there is always other methods, as his mind lingered on the hidden chamber miles below the school.

The darkness seemed to throb, almost with a heartbeat, as he started slightly as a feminine voice called from the darkness. " Is anyone here?"

The darkness seemed to swirl around her as she took each step forth, calling out she hoped that she sounded more confident then she felt. Finally a voice answered in response, careless and masculine :

" It's just me." Coming into the fringes of the light cast by her wand the handsome features of Tom Riddle came into view. His eyes seemed to possess a darkness all his own as he stared into hers with an almost hungry look.

" What are you doing here?" she demanded.

" I was on my way to the library…to return a book…" He waved a thick leather-bound text in his hand, " when the staircase shifted and well.…here I am." His smile did little to quell the idea that the boy was in fact lying. But McGonagall had little to accuse him on so instead she settled for a gruff:

" Well, off you go then, this is no place for students."

To her annoyance he stayed rooted to the ground. The light casting an odd milky glow to his skin, he cocked his head to one side as if admiring a piece of rather abstract art.

" You know Minerva…"

How did he know her name? Never mind, he was leaning closer now then personal boundaries stood for.

" I must ask…"

She felt her heart pound against her ribcage in an untimely manner, his breath made the spare tendrils around her face flutter as he continued:

" …was your father a thief?"

" E-excuse me?" Either her brain was working at a snails pace, or what he had just said really did not make any sense.

" What n-no. Don't be ridiculous."

The amusement still did not leave his tone as he continued " because it seems he has stolen the stars and placed them in your eyes…"

He brushed past her in his way to finally make his way down the stairwell, and for the first time Minerva embraced the darkness, for it hid the raging fire that threatened to engulf her face.

So although his plan had failed, Tom Riddle could not help but smile to himself as he made his way back to the common room book tucked safely beneath his arm, thinking that maybe some forms of corruption were not altogether as horrible as they seemed.

A/N: Thank you for getting this far! Now please take the time to drop a quick review, this is my first attempt at combining humor and drama and I would greatly appreciate CC!


End file.
